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turn-signal

Acme motors ships 2016 cars without turn signals to Massachusetts

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In a controversial move, Acme Motors became the first car maker to produce vehicles without the turn signal system in them.

“We call the turn-signal-less vehicle the New Englander,” said Acme CEO Jim Patrick. “Our studies showed the turn signal in New England was the most underutilized part of our vehicles. It was like an appendix. It didn’t make sense to ship cars with useless organs.”

Acme Motors stock soared 90% on the news driving their share price from $10 to $19 on the New Boston Stock Exchange. James “Lights Out” Toney will be the first official spokesman for the new vehicles.

“We expect the company to save $100 million over the next few years,” said Kevin McCormick, a stock analyst with McCormick & McCormick, a leading auto industry analyst.

But the move has consequences and hurt turn signal manufacturers revenue. “What the f*ck am I suppose to do with all these turn signal sticks? Lights?” stated CEO Randy Johnson. “I’m going to have to lay off thousands.”

4 Comments

  • Michlene Faria
    July 30, 2015 @ 1:46 pm

    Idiots! !!! I can only begin to imagine the lawsuits. One more way for lawyers to make money.

    Reply

  • Sandy
    July 31, 2015 @ 1:24 pm

    Prepare for more accidents!!!

    Reply

  • ianosmond
    February 16, 2016 @ 12:08 pm

    It’s a terrible idea. How are you going to leave your left blinker on for thirty miles if you don’t have a left blinker?

    Reply

  • Paul
    April 14, 2016 @ 4:49 pm

    I hate those things. I can’t reach them when I’m on the phone. I turn them on by accident when I’m trying to find the wipers.

    Reply

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